As a child I felt the pain of others. My over-sensitivity disorder was not a concept back then, nor was my hyperactive nature, which today we call ADHD. My anxiety was paralyzing. For my teen-age years, I was basically a selective mute. It was only my friends and pets that could engage my joy.
As I grew up, concepts of suffering and humanity flew in to my thought process that I didn’t necessarily seek. As time passed I was naturally pulled into the teachings and life style beliefs that are all core to Buddhism. For over 20 years I lived with Buddhist practices as it was all I was comfortable doing, but also felt if any one knew they’d question my decision, motives and reasoning. The time for which I negatively experimented with life and didn’t cherish and honor my soul, I ended up crashing to the floor because I wasn’t wholeheartedly practicing what I believed. When I hit rock bottom I believed I had no value. But it all made sense to me. Growing up with vicarious trauma form witnessing regular domestic violence allowed the black cloud to follow me throughout life. I never looked up, because I pretended it wasn't there. It was a huge risk for me to show the world that I had issues so deep that I didn’t want to live anymore. Being displaced was what I knew best. Growing up with such mental distortions and messages forced me to connect with the universe in a very spiritual and loving way. All I had was myself. As life unfolded my passion became my career. For over 23 years now I've been a licensed clinical therapist specializing in mental health issues and helping others take the healing journey. Whether it be helping someone manage their Covid-19 fear, manage divorce, mourn through the stages of grief or find inner peace through learning to live with ADHD, I'm there. Helping others is my life mission - it not only feels good, it feels right.
The words of Joseph Campbell are indeed true, “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.”
As a child I studied everything I could about compassion, psychology, loneliness, family dysfunction, brain development, love, relationships and social interaction. Through years of introspection, therapy and spiritual healing I decided to get to know the real me. One miraculous theme rose to the top of my psyche and wouldn’t leave. I knew as a child and I believe now, if I want to forever live in peace and harmony, I must teach the world to live the same way. If I stray from compassion then others stray. If I love, then others love. Raising my boys with this knowledge brings joy into my heart. As they have the core principles of what the world needs, it comes naturally to them. I birthed my boys loving them even before I met them. Because they were born into love, love is all they know. My highest hopes are for my sons to see their struggles as passing moments and lessons and not as their sole identities.
I am forever grateful you have come to read about living a more healthy and positive life. I have found and I’m sure you know that:
1. When you give love you get love. Criticizing or judging others will never get you the love you want.
2. Holding on to resentment only leaves you cold and stale inside. Once we forgive others and ourselves it’s a lot easier to live peacefully and lovingly.
3. Drama and negativity are ways to distract oneself from pain and suffering. Once you give up drama all the valuable work will happen within.
4. No one really cares what you do or what you look like. People are too busy and preoccupied with themselves. When we take the pressure off ‘being’ perfect life feels free, unrestricted and worthwhile.
5. You don’t ever need a reason to help someone. Reach out. You’ll be surprised at how many people are waiting to hear from you.
6. People who don’t listen are in pain. They incessantly talk and don’t listen because no one has ever listen to them, made them feel worthy or have accepted them unconditionally. Have compassion and a new understanding of others instead of defaulting to judgment.
7. We’re all doing the best we can with what we’ve got. Until one does some pretty deep introspection, it’s hard to make changes. Having this knowledge is the first step to into personal growth so the real self can thrive.
8. You are ultimately responsible for your own peace of mind. The minute you stop expecting others to meet your needs, you can begin to take care of yourself in the most optimal way!
9. The planet needs you in one form or another. It’s up to you to tap into how you can serve the universe with your unique god-given power.
“The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering.” —Ben Okri